Mail Box Wisdom!

What exactly does this say? Drip Sake? Why? Am I missing something here? What does it mean? I am confused!

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Time To Dress Up: It's Halloween!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO YOU ALL

This is not my dog! I wish I had one. And if I had one, I sure would dress it up for Halloween.

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Best Costume Award Goes To...!

Best Halloween Costume goes to ... this broken light post on Smith. This costume has it all: functionality, originality as well as that certain je-ne-sais-quoi. It's just fabulous!

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Because We Have To Laugh Sometimes!

Who can say it better than The Onion? When you are sick of regular news coverage, this little rag puts things in perspective.

Putting Pressure On Iran

From The Onion: America's Finest News Source

The White House is looking at deterring the Iranian nuclear program with new sanctions. What measures have been proposed?

• Cutting off two-thirds of Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's name any time he is mentioned in the press
• Revoking the country's membership in the axis of evil
• Ceasing production of monogrammed "U.S. & Iran: A Perfect Match" matchbooks
• Miss America not including Iran on world tour
• Jesse Jackson to be sent, without an interpreter, to negotiate
• Copyrighting the phrase "The Great Satan" and suing Iran every time it is used to refer to U.S.
• Putting restrictions on how much Iran is allowed to hate the U.S. at any given moment
• Will stop selling them uranium

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Monday, Funny Monday!

Lets face it: Mondays are tough. A little laughter can go a long way. Here is the best headline from The Onion, the best little spoof paper around.

Shaking Off Amnesia, Gonzales Remembers He's Actually Pool Salesman From Tulsa

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EEEEKKKK! Marty Markowitz's Building Has Bed Bugs!

I could not help but laugh when I read this little tidbit about our very entertaining and annoying Brooklyn Borough President Marty Markowitz. It seems that his apartment building has a nasty outbreak of bed bugs. Of course my little mind went on overdrive. What if Marty infested the Queen Mary cruise ship with bed bugs? After all, he just spent 6 days, all expenses payed, aboard that luxury liner. A free cruise just for being Brooklyn's B.P.
Now that would be funny, no?


From The Daily Intelligencer
New Yotk Magazine June 5,07
It's not news that bedbugs are resurgent in New York, infesting all sorts of apartments in all parts of the city. But now we know the little critters might be heading for our leaders: Several residents of Marty Markowitz's Prospect Park West apartment house confirm that the borough president's building has an outbreak of the bugs. One resident spotted her own infestation two years ago and hired an exterminator; two months ago, another fled her apartment because of the bugs. Flyers appeared in the building last month carrying pictures of the tiny culprits and reminding residents of scheduled exterminator visits on the first Saturday of each month. Markowitz's spokeswoman says the beep's apartment has so far been spared. But he's still being safe. "I'm going to go along with my building's plans to fumigate to prevent my unit and others from getting them," he told us via the rep. Good luck, Marty. The borough is counting on you. —Eric V. Copage Read more

German Word Of The Day

Putzfimmel: Noun; An obsession with cleaning
Now I don't want any comments about the fact that I am making fun of Germany's preoccupation with cleanliness. I am German myself, so I can get away with it. As a matter of fact, I have been accused of having a Putzfimmel, though you could not tell from my house at the moment, what with me heading off to Manhattan every day for the last two weeks. I just thought the above picture kind of illustrated the Teutonic obsession with keeping thinks spic-and-span.
Now if Luft'waffe' were not so expensive from New York, I would fly them instead of those other, slightly dirtier airlines. Read more

Great Advertisement!

Now this is creative thinking. And funny! An ad for Post-It notes. Read more

Much Needed Friday Humor

Air Traffic Controller Likes Pattern He Has Going

From "The Onion" www.theonion.com Read more

Best New Product

Since I am here in the sun and you are not, I thought I would be nice and let you know about the nifty new products you can use right at your desk, at your office. This way, you have a tan when I come back and you won't be jealous.. it's only 25 bucks.

USB Desktop Tanning Center
Your Desktop Fun-without-the-sun Buddy
from www.thinkgeek.com

Here at ThinkGeek, we fully understand the sun isn't always your best friend. But, unlike vampire rats, the sun is not PURE evil. It does have a few redeeming qualities. Like sunspots and eclipses. It's also used to grow your own 1up Mushrooms. Some people even tunnel sun rays through a magnifying glass to set leaves, insects and ladyfingers in a glorious blaze. One of the strangest qualities of the Sun, however, is that it can make the color of your skin change. And while it is very dangerous to the cells in your epidermis, this practice of changing ones skin color purportedly makes you more socially acceptable in general and desireable to the opposite sex. What geek doesn't want that?
If you get into the deep chemical and engineering science of this process, you'll soon figure out that it's the UV rays that cause this skin color change. And, lucky for you, UV rays are easy to produce in mass quantities of lamps built in China and sold on ThinkGeek. Yay!
Don't let the sun have the monopoly on making people love you more. Get the USB Desktop Tanning center and, in the comfort of your own cubicle, a scrumptiously golden tone can be yours in about the same time it takes you to update your lame blog with another meaningless entry that nobody will ever read. Ever.
Features:
Two base units attach to either side of your monitor
4 WOLFFE Ultra-violet 100 watt bulbs
USB Powered
Variable rate knob features three settings (Powder, Tea, Malignant)
Comes with eyeball cover thingies!

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY! Read more

Edgy Comedy

Here is a brilliant little sketch by Palestinian- American comic Aron Kader. It was part of the "Axis of Evil Comedy Tour" on Comedy Central, the first TV stand-up show with all Middle Eastern--American comics What can I say? Its razor sharp! Watch it!


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Dumb Blondes Of The Debutante Ball!

February marks the beginning of the social season in Texas. And with that the Debutante Balls. This year, the young Texas ladies are lovelier than ever. Read more

But wait! There is more!

Sometimes, you need an editor, or just someone who can translate from Chinese into English. This herb and vegetable Chopper sure seems like a handy little kitchen tool. But the instruction on the box are a bit hard to follow. I guess I know what they are trying to say, but then again..... Below is the actual text on the Chopper box.

"Mode of Job for Multi-Chopper"
In order that the article has minced could be perfectly cut, Knocked Vigorously in the bud Superior hand Opened.
The most or less great number of knocks determines the fineness of cup. The rotation of knives is made automatically and regularly.
For the cleaning, to pull the inferior bell and to release the recipient Superior. Well to rinse the machine, if possible to the running water. Re-assembly in Senses inverts, All parts metallic are executed in a materials has the test of the rust. Read more

Milk Is Good For You!

Forget Match. com. Sometimes, a simpler approach makes more sense.
A couple of single Welsh dairy farmers came up with the idea of placing their photos on milk bottles in the hope of finding true love. Turns out that dairy farmers in Wales don't have too much of an opportunity to meet the opposite sex. So just in time for St Dwynwen's Day, the equivalent to Valentine's day, the unattached farmers from a Welsh milk cooperative called "Calon Wen" have come up with the brilliant idea of promoting themselves in order to hook up.. The campaign is called "Fancy a farmer." The stickers on the milk containers direct interested parties to a singles web site called Pishyn Wales.
More information on the three men and two women dairy farmers of the month can be read there. So if you should be interested, here is the link :http://www.pishynwales.com/gwefan/?L=cms.calonwen
Who knows, maybe Welsh dairy farmers are more interesting than the singles on Match. You never know!

Here is some music to get you into a dairy country frame of mind

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Tonight's speech Today

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A Funny LIttle PIll

Found on the web and Oh so funny! The perfect drug :Fukitol
Hey, maybe I will pop a few tonight while watching the Prez's speech. Read more

Men In Leggings

News flash to all guys. The newest fashion trend out of Milan is skin tight leggings. Yup, the type that will accentuate every imperfection. No more hiding those extra pounds. No more hiding that rippling skin. Finally, there is equality in fashion! Guys will be as self conscious as women have been for years when it comes to their figures. I am all for it. The only question is: how do we get the guys to wear them?
Now for something completely different: Are you going to watch the President's speech tonight? I feel as though I have to make myself watch it so that I know to what new lows he will sink.

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Mice On a Plane

First there was a movie about snakes on a plane, now little furry critters are running around the cabin. This would be my ultimate nightmare. EEEEEEEEEEK! But pardon me for asking! How come someone got away with entering a plane with a bagful of mice when I am not even able to take a lipbalm onboard? What do you think?

From the BBC News Website: Mass mouse escape on Saudi plane

More than 100 passengers on a Saudi plane were left panic-stricken by the unexpected appearance of furry fellow flyers - dozens of mice.
The small rodents - about 80 in total, according to a local newspaper - escaped from the bag of a man travelling on the domestic flight.
An airline official said the aircraft was at 28,000 feet (8,500m) when mice began scurrying around the cabin.
Some of the mice fell on passengers' heads, Al-Hayat newspaper reports.
The incident occurred on a Saudi Arabian Airlines flight from the capital, Riyadh, to north-eastern town of Tabuk.
The flight landed safely and the bag's owner was detained by police investigating how he managed to get the mice onto the plane.
No explanation was given for the man's cargo. Read more